How to cope with the holidays after a breakup

Let's face it, the holidays are often the toughest times of the year to endure a breakup. Trust me, I know, as I have been there. Emotionally there are just no words to describe how you feel, but evidently you are alone. You have the choice to feel sorry for yourself and look for reasons why the relationship failed or you can embrace the present and enjoy this special time with family, friends and over looked ones.

Is it possible to deal with the holidays after a breakup? Of course it is. If it were not, you would not see people who have experienced a breakup happy at all during the holidays, let alone moving on. The reality is coping with the holidays after a breakup is a hard thing to do especially if you were involved with the person for quite a while or in short, you really did love the person.

So, how do you cope with the holidays after a breakup?

First and foremost, you want to avoid feeling sorry for yourself at all costs. Over-analyzing what went wrong is pretty much equivalent to speaking to a wall and asking yourself why it is painted. Kind of like running on a treadmill at 10 mph for an hour and wondering why you are not going anywhere. Recognize that everything happens for a reason and avoid overthinking about everything around that reason.

Secondly, set goals for yourself and continue reaching out to the goals you had originally set when you were with your ex. Your goal is to focus on yourself. Embrace the concept of being single and work on yourself, as this is one of the best opportunities to do so. You know how you originally planned to do Christmas Shopping for Black Friday or celebrate Valentine's Day at your favorite eatery? Go alone or better yet, invite a girlfriend or two. Don't allow the person you are not with anymore stop you.

You want to avoid as much negativity as possible, as that is worse than being reminded that you are not with your significant other anymore. The holidays are all about being happy and implementing and embracing the good things they offer. It is very important to recognize the origin of the holidays and embrace for what they really are. Whether Hallmark or not, anyone can enjoy the holidays no matter what their status is.

You have the choice to sit at home sobbing over what went wrong while watching Sex & the City reruns (which isn't a bad thing, minus the sobbing) or you can recognize the good the holidays offer and enjoy them with family and friends. Life is way too short and exciting to allow one individual to affect it. Remember, every holiday is a memory breeding experience. Don't let the emotional distress ruin it.